Saint Joseph School

It was the nite that November was sayed to be sexualy Assualted Detective was on the case looking for clues that might have been linked to Novembers assualent. Franciscross was in the area also looking for clues along with Annie Dromida.

"Everyone Report ether of you find anything"Detective asked while questioning skulls

"nothing yet D, but ill keep looking. we have to find out what happind to November" Fran replied as she was cheacking up on Annie to make sure she was ok

"ok keep me posted"

"so D what do u think happind"

"well i remmember seeing something in the boiler room but i didnt think much of it, that is untill i learned what it was"*looking as if he knew exactly what happind*

"what was it" Annie asked polotly

"it was a page in the ferness that wasnt like all the others it wasnt burning but i figured it was just resently put in there"

"was there anything on it?"

at that momment everyone lost conection with Detective all of Paragon no one could find him

"crap where did he go now"Fran asked with a nervous pause as she remmemberd what Detective ones told her in the exact same area he disapeared

"FRAN, get over here NOW"Annie excalamed

"what is it nowww, Detective!, Detective!!, are u there

and there coverd in blood and something in his hands was Detective lieing in the middle of the forest right outside of the boneyard district

"wha....what happind" as Detective noticed what he was wearing he looked up only to find Fran and Annie scared for Detective and also Scared of Detective at that point "what, whats wrong girl" as he looks down to find he is in blood stained cloths he opens the palm of his hand only to find Moths embalm there tantered and blood staned.

"D!, what happind are u ok"

as Detective remmembers something he begins to cry"no....NO THIS ISNT WHAT I AM ANYMORE"

"D, what are u talking about"

Detective gets his jacket off and throws it far ways, "no she is gone i killed her she cant do this to me anymore"

As Annie starts to cry scared about what D has done or what he will be blaimed for he proseads to tell the girls of the wemon he saved over in Iraq when he was serving and there named may not be comon but he called them by it never the less there names where, Karma and Vengence!

((what u guys think about part 1?))

All right, Det! Your boldest piece yet!

I think it's very promising, but I really have some advice for you. Write your piece in Microsoft Word and run spell/grammar check before you post. You have an interesting idea, but (and you have attested to this yourself) your typing skills need work.

I think if you take the time to run it through a spellcheck, you will enjoy it more, and it will become easier to read, enabling everyone else to enjoy it more.

I know you're new to RP and fiction-writing, so I think you've come a long way and I'm proud to see that. I'm also glad to see that you want to be part of the active community of shared fiction for SJS. Now you just need to put in that final 10% and clean your piece up... and then, we'll see where it goes.

u got it mimi ill definatly work on that typeing problem i have and thanks foe the coment

i have to ask, how is it you type much better in game and during combat than on the forums when you have all the time you want

You know what? I have wondered that myself ;P

ooc:

Um. No one is supposed to have known about this "rape" thing besides David Conrads, the Sister, and I.


How would have Detective, Francis, and Annie found out?
You can't just make characters omniscient.


Ugh. This story just frustrates me.

((Annie's just been told about things, she never found out for herself. In actuality, she's having a very hard time wrapping her mind around the concept.

It is for that reason I can remain blissfully ignorant of November's situation, and focus on the more public aspect of Detective's problem. I leave it to you ))

i'm not one to knock creative idea's, but I agree with November on the fact that only one person really thinks she was assulted, everyone else just thinks she's nuts as usual( ok so when I say everyone I mean me).

the story arch has potential for great fun both in game and on the forums, perhaps asking first would have prevented any issues this has caused.

can't fault the effort D.

ow......ouch my bad bell, if i knew that i wouldnt have done this im sry

ya from now on ill wait to ask if i ever want to get involved in anything sry ones again bell

(( ooc, if conrads believes an assault occurred and mmmmay for whatever reason not want things to get out of hand, perhaps get detective involved..? i don't know conrad's character, so either asking for help in such a way, or dropping hints to manipulate Det into looking into it, might be completely impossible. Just a thought on a way to reconcile the stories..? ))

((OOC))

in my deffence i agree with amends being how im a detective maybe he thought i could solve this thing, just in my defence its your choise bell and ill agree with wha ever u want its your story

Actually, we did a littel in-game RP on this and I may have a solution.

As many of you may know, Det got involved with a bad Council scene and wound up mixed in with their bad bunch, contracting (or being purposely infected) with the virus that causes some of the Council to degrade into "vampire" like creatures.

It would also seem as though they have gone one step further, offering his body as a sort of refuge to a powerful and malicious spirit they had summoned.

As Det, Sapphire and I discussed, it is a possibility that this malevolant spirit feeds upon negative energy. The spirit (whose name I do not rmember Det, I'm sorry) may be planting false memories into Det's head to its own twisted delight...

What results is that it is this spirit that is motivating events, leading Det to draw the conclusion that he is responsible for what happened in the boiler room. The spirit is affecting his mind, making him believe that he is responsible.

This requires a little history revision, but brings this story more into line with the darker shades that both Wachabe and Jaygo have already trod upon. What makes this different is that while Conrads suspects that Jaygo or Wachabe may be involved, he has no such suspicions about Det. It is in Det's own mind that he has become implecated.

Anyway, we worked out some of this, but a few questions, and where we want to go with it from here, remains sort of up in the air.

i also agree with mimi as long as its ok with u bell im in no possition to make u take my idea over what u would like to happin, its all up to u

Mimi wrote:Actually, we did a littel in-game RP on this and I may have a solution.

As many of you may know, Det got involved with a bad Council scene and wound up mixed in with their bad bunch, contracting (or being purposely infected) with the virus that causes some of the Council to degrade into "vampire" like creatures.

It would also seem as though they have gone one step further, offering his body as a sort of refuge to a powerful and malicious spirit they had summoned.

As Det, Sapphire and I discussed, it is a possibility that this malevolant spirit feeds upon negative energy. The spirit (whose name I do not rmember Det, I'm sorry) may be planting false memories into Det's head to its own twisted delight...

What results is that it is this spirit that is motivating events, leading Det to draw the conclusion that he is responsible for what happened in the boiler room. The spirit is affecting his mind, making him believe that he is responsible.

This requires a little history revision, but brings this story more into line with the darker shades that both Wachabe and Jaygo have already trod upon. What makes this different is that while Conrads suspects that Jaygo or Wachabe may be involved, he has no such suspicions about Det. It is in Det's own mind that he has become implecated.

Anyway, we worked out some of this, but a few questions, and where we want to go with it from here, remains sort of up in the air.

Phew, that brings a lot more clarity to this. I just don't think the girls should be involved. I mean, honestly, if someone did get raped in real life, a detective would not appoint two under-aged girls from the victim's school to search for clues. That would be a huge confidentiality issue and totally lacks any sort of professionalism.